What's going on
11 January 2024, Boroszewo
I’m home alone.
The Bunnies are in Gdańsk (first day in the open kindergarten) and I’m enjoying my (well-deserved) self-love day.
My main agenda for the coming hours is first to reconnect with my deepest parts and listen what they have to say, then turn their wisdom into Action.
Floating moves.
Let’s start with a recap of recent happenings.
ღ Turbulence & revival at Home
The last couple of days were quite intense.
Moutainships of work, challenging outside aura, echoes of the past, and anxiety about the future painted our days with tension, mood swings, unhealthy behaviours, and all-around drama.
Mraka.
My rock bottom was either the full psycho stadium meltdown on Monday or shouting with fiery aggression at Hugo (he didn’t want to dress up) yesterday.
My partner-in-life was hurting even more.
Luckily, it seems we’ve both crossed the chasm.
It’s sunnier (shame that only inside) with every passing minute.
The snow melts.
Spring starts.
ღ Sharing
I confronted my fear and started sharing my works.
It feels unreal.
I struggle(d) a lot with self-esteem, especially when it comes to work.
My history of getting fired, not earning, frequent changes of the course, left me hurting, inconfident, and feeling worthless.
It took a shitload of work, both psycho-internal and physical, to finally break through, and show what I do.
I never expected how much it takes to actually follow dreams.
But I’m determined.
I put in the hours.
I move, often even when parts of me don’t feel like it.
I create a way, no matter the odds.
And that’s what I want to thank myself for.
The effort.
ღ Toddler’s Life
Hugi is very engaging at the moment.
He requires 24/7 attention, care, and love.
I understand it.
He’s evolving rapidly (growth spurt), his home is not exactly an oasis, boredom creeps in.
A recipe for challenging time.
I’m trying to do my best to uplift & entertain, and it succeeds most of the time.
But there’s room to improve, no doubt.
ღ Marbella / next chapter
Winter is not our friend.
However zen I want to remain about it, the truth is all of us prefer the sun to the cold & gloom.
I do my best to stay mood-weatherproof, but bloody hell I don’t know how many more dress-up dramas I can survive.
It’s not only about the weather.
Looking back at our time in Spain (and I do that quite a lot, if only for work purposes) I see how easier living felt there.
And I want it back.
Solitude, repeatable days, little new stimuli, and the fucking weather.
Hopefully it ends soon.
Very soon.
My intention for today and the coming days is to get us radical closer to flying out.
In ideal scenario, we buy the tickets on my birthday, which is in 5 days.
This naturally leads me to the topic of work, and what’s next.
Without money, none of it will be possible.
It's my utmost priority to solve the dollar equation and afford the lifestyle we want and deserve.
It’s also about my wellbeing.
I know the money issues are the greatest contributor to my negative self-image.
Sure, part of it can be healed through aura work (another big topic) but let’s not fool ourselves here.
Only money, money I earn, will actually change things for good.
What is blocking me?
Obviously, myself only.
I can come up with a million(&one) excuses & fairytales.
Harsh reality is I’m in control.
Go make it happen.
Last parting words before coffee & cold shower break:
Barti, love.
Yes, there’s a lot on your plate.
It’s normal and okay to feel drained, anxious, and tense in such conditions.
But remember, you’re stronger than any obstacles.
You can & will rise up to the challenge.
You’re ready.
This is your moment.
Shine, Love!
Making it happen.
I want:
a) keep creating
b) share the love
c) money in the bank
d) live amazing days
I know how to win a) & d).
Let’s focus on the weak-links.
Practice makes progress.
Jumping right in, straight into the Beast’s cave.
Money.
Being brutally honest with myself
It’s the paid subscription money that I crave the most
I’m absolutely inconfident if I can make it work
The vision of seeing an inbox full of “new paid subscriber” emails makes me melt.
If I knew I couldn’t fail, I’d throw myself into a creative & sharing frenzy, and count/hope it translates into gold.
But I don’t have time for “Hope” and waiting for things to magically happen.
Only I, through focused action can get it done.
What if it’s not a monster who’s living in the cave, but a stunning beauty, the muse of rich?
Fundamentals.
① Create Great Stuff
② Get it into People’s hands
③ Offer amazing value
④ Get paid handsomely
① I do have amazing stuff cooked.
Whether that’s Spain series, the end-of-the-year entries, or the most recent journals (not to mention the entire backcatalog) I can safely assume the Works stand on their own feet.
② I’ve made progress in the sharing department, but it’s still the very beginning
The only way to move the needle is to do more of it
Create, Share, Experiment
Create Share, Experiment
Reps, Reps, Reps
The secret ingredient?
Go wilder.
Find new places to share.
Try new approaches.
Don’t dim your light.
Connect through love
Getting more tactical, here are a couple things I’m considering
a) Substack Notes
There is an existing community of readers (&buyers) who hang out in this quirky corner of the Internet called Substack(Notes). It’s not as glamorous (yet?) as Instagram, way more rough around the edges.
But maybe that’s what makes it an opportunity?
Converting people from Instagram into buyers might take a while (the sheer size of this opportunity is gigantic tough. win Insta = win life).
On Substack, however, people are used to buying, or rather supporting.
If they see something they love, they happily pay for it.
Win-win.
How do we get this experiment going?
What’s the first step?
Sharing the first note, and then proceeding to share my best work whole having a brilliant offer for my supporters/community is the step to take.
b) Instagram
Regarding Insta, I want to keep it going.
One, I love it.
Two, it’s playing the long game.
Three, it *might* translate into some instant money too (friends?)
Four, I just know it’s right.
Keeping the eye on the prize however I believe it’s rational to experiment with other approaches too.
That is Notes…(twitter?)
One more thing with Insta.
Get creative & bold with how I share.
It’s an art in itself to spread the love.
③ Money in the bank
The big dilemma is whether to focus solely on paid subs (at least for the time being) or pursue other streams of income too.
Imagining how it would feel like to get even 20 founding members on board (20x 100$ = 2000 $) makes me ecstatic (belly anxious too…)
Is it possible?
Ideally before my Bday?
Only shooting the shot can tell.
The one scenario I really fear is throwing myself all-in into trying to make paid subs happen and walking away empty-handed, hating myself for not spending this time searching for a “normal job”.
I’m torn apart by this choice.
Focus on one thing I want the most
or
Diversify for lesser risk.
I think I know the answer, at least for the next flurry of moves.
Actually, let’s make it official:
I’m giving myself full permission to materialize the founding member dream until my Birthday.
If it doesn’t yield the desired effect, I vow to get a job.
Let the games begin.
PS. This is by no means a reason to get tense & rigid.
Conversely, if I am to deliver, I need all the fluidity, spontaneity & creativity that flows in my blood.
Focus, but with ease.
Graceful Pursuit through Bubbly Manouvers Doings.
PS2. Remember the guy from yesterday’s “Home” screening?
He was constantly creating, sharing, inviting people in.
Zero pretension, self-righteousness, or willingness to impress anyone.
Simply doing what he enjoys, sharing it openly, and connecting through it.
It’s safe to assume the money followed right?
Just look at his Home.
Btw. it was the most inspirational thing/person/family I have ever seen.
I want to build that kind of future for my people too.
Home of Love.
Let’s talk logistics.
Nuts & bolts.
Assume it’s 16 January 2024.
What does the reality look like?
I wake up well rested, without the hint of anxiety in my consciousness.
I know I did a good job over the last couple of days, and it fills me with satisfaction.
I open my inbox to see how many new paid subscribers I’ve acquired since I’ve last checked (there’s been a couple paid signups over the course of the week already)
I cannot believe my eyes.
I’ve crushed all of my wildest expectations, and the inbox is overflowing with buyers/readers.
The experiments I’ve launched over the past couple days, especially the last push <jab, jab, punch> worked.
And in style.
Throughout the process of acquiring new members I’ve remained honest, open & fun.
Actually, these are not only buyers or subscribers.
These are new friends who fell in love with my works, and want to support my further explorations, and be part of my Crew.
Who are these folks?
Some of the are my long-time friends who decided to chip in, and support a friend on his mission.
Some come from the Substack Ecosystem. Those are people who got attracted to what I shared and want even more of it.
Some followed me on Insta after my flurry of publications. They either loved what I do so much they want to keep me going (money = fuel) or got attracted to the amazing offer I posted.
How did they find me?
Some of them discovered me through the postings on Instagram, notably the Spain series and the current journals (?). These posts & reels, this project gained significant traction spreading by word of mouth and few notable reshared from larger accounts. (paid too?)
Some of them come from Substack Notes. I’ve posted couple of nice things, and people noticed. Now they want to be a part of it.
Some are friends, who I directly talked to. Posting these stories is a great way to reconnect. I will not be pushy, but there’s a chance some of the interactions may turn into business too.
Now, the opposite.
Imagine it’s 16 January and everything went wrong.
0 new subs. 0 dollars. Nada.
What did I do wrong?
✗ I didn’t share enough for people to fall in love with what I do
✗ I didn’t craft a compelling offer / give a good reason to buy
✗ I didn’t ask for buying specifically, in plain English
✗ There just weren’t enough people attracted. I failed at the stage of getting my works into people’s hands.
✗ I spent too much time doubting instead of creating, building, shipping, and sharing. Focus that could have been used for making it happen was wasted on overthinking, doubt, etc. Do & Smash!
✗ One more thing - I didn’t invest enough heart, time & energy into the selling process.
It’s one thing to be aware of:
Don’t fall into the trap of magical thinking, and only doing what you are comfortable with, that is creating.
The success of this endeavor is equal parts connected to the inner artist, as well as the chief revenue guy/manager.
We both have our roles to play in this spectacle.
Showtime!
PS. Relax, and let the hands do their job. We got this.
Okay, I need a little break from all the seriousness.
Let the goofyness ensue.
Amazing things - yesterday (10 January)
ღ Taking the lead
My buddies needed the love.
This time it meant spending the day together, and me providing both the entertainment, as well as the mood-leadership.
I had one or two off-moments (screaming at Hugo for not dressing up, and exploding at Natalia, cruelly blaming her for messing up today while she was seriously hurting), but apart from that, did my job super well.
Proud dad & husband achievement.
Lift ’em up!
ღ Haos 4 Ever
The best way to fix Nati’s mood?
Great food in great setting.
While only my dish was truly remarkable, the time we’ve spent there was priceless.
One up!
ღ Quick Mimi Garage Meet
God, I love this guy.
Just as we said yesterday with Nati: he’s got a really really good heart, a rare treasure.
I’m so sorry to hear you’ve got so much on your plate, Brother.
But you’ll figure it out.
You got this.
ღ High Evening
Natural medicine worked like a charm.
Inhale the ease!
ღ “Home” screening
Already mentioned before, but who cares.
I’ll say it again.
This episode changed the trajectory of my life.
I’m beyond inspired, ready to build (&connect).
ღ Gluey Hugi
He just couldn't get enough of me.
Reading books, making juice, the now classic fisherman & sea creatures game, all the love.
J’Adore Hugo.
+the Photos he makes WOW TALENT!
Amazing things - 9 January “Snow Beach”
ღ Buddies Again
I took Hugi to Gdańsk for a day full of adventures.
We both needed it.
Everything flowed so well between us, just the way it should.
Adventure bonds.
ღ Snow Beach
Sliding on the ice right next to the sea, winter playground, the icicles, and waffle party.
Brzeźno, Dziwko!
ღ Ikea
The Swedes know how to create beautiful surroundings + moments.
Always a good visit.
ღ “I had such a great day”
- Hugi
🪬 Hope you have one too.
Love, Bartosz